Saturday, June 19, 2010
Monday, June 14, 2010
Shenanigans!
So a few weeks ago I attended the Pickering Ribfest. I didn't actually get any ribs because they were about 25 bones a rack and I'm really cheap/broke.
Instead me and a buddy dropped 6 bucks each on these giant steel mugs of root beer.
I've never had so much pop in one sitting in my life but it was definitely worth it.
Anyways, sometime during our stay, we passed by this booth selling energy drinks where people were filling out little sheets of paper and putting them into a box.
The girl told us that they were running some contest where you can win iPods, boats, vacations, typical contest prizes.
We both entered and left after she tried to sell us some random energy drink I had never heard of. I told her "we'll come back when we're thirsty". Then proceeded to avoid that booth every time we passed by it.
Flash forward two weeks later and I get a call from some long ass number. We have caller ID so I don't pick up the phone when I see a number that's longer than your regular 9 digits because it's always some dude asking if I want to subscribe to the Toronto Star, if I need windows, etc. (What the fuck happened to that National Do-Not-Call list anyway?)
This number has been calling for a good week now and I ignore it, but my mom picks up. She hands me the phone mentioning something about the ribfest and I take the phone.
Lady on the line named Barbie (who the fuck names their kid after a doll?) tells me I've won some vacation to Florida.
I've won quite a few things in the past that were actually legit so I figure I'll hear her out since I actually remember entering this thing.
She goes over the details of the trip, blah blah blah, then at the end of this 10 minute long explanation she nonchalantly mentions a promotional fee of 480 something bucks and moves on to her next point.
You sly little bitch.
"Sorry, you said there's a promotional fee?"
"Of course!"
"Uhh..."
"It's a $5000 dollar trip!"
"Uhh...not interested..."
"Are you sure? If you don't claim it now I'll have to give this amazing opportunity to the next person on the list!"
"Sorry."
*more details on trip* (At this point I stopped listening)
At this point I could have called her some really mean names like I wanted to but I didn't and just hung up the phone.
What a fucking scam, and what's sad is some people actually fall for this and end up with nothing but a lighter wallet.
Now if you'll excuse me, a Nigerian prince is offering me $800 000 if I just give him my credit card number and lend him $20 000.
What a sucker this guy is...
UPDATE:
Instead me and a buddy dropped 6 bucks each on these giant steel mugs of root beer.
I've never had so much pop in one sitting in my life but it was definitely worth it.
Anyways, sometime during our stay, we passed by this booth selling energy drinks where people were filling out little sheets of paper and putting them into a box.
The girl told us that they were running some contest where you can win iPods, boats, vacations, typical contest prizes.
We both entered and left after she tried to sell us some random energy drink I had never heard of. I told her "we'll come back when we're thirsty". Then proceeded to avoid that booth every time we passed by it.
Flash forward two weeks later and I get a call from some long ass number. We have caller ID so I don't pick up the phone when I see a number that's longer than your regular 9 digits because it's always some dude asking if I want to subscribe to the Toronto Star, if I need windows, etc. (What the fuck happened to that National Do-Not-Call list anyway?)
This number has been calling for a good week now and I ignore it, but my mom picks up. She hands me the phone mentioning something about the ribfest and I take the phone.
Lady on the line named Barbie (who the fuck names their kid after a doll?) tells me I've won some vacation to Florida.
I've won quite a few things in the past that were actually legit so I figure I'll hear her out since I actually remember entering this thing.
She goes over the details of the trip, blah blah blah, then at the end of this 10 minute long explanation she nonchalantly mentions a promotional fee of 480 something bucks and moves on to her next point.
You sly little bitch.
"Sorry, you said there's a promotional fee?"
"Of course!"
"Uhh..."
"It's a $5000 dollar trip!"
"Uhh...not interested..."
"Are you sure? If you don't claim it now I'll have to give this amazing opportunity to the next person on the list!"
"Sorry."
*more details on trip* (At this point I stopped listening)
At this point I could have called her some really mean names like I wanted to but I didn't and just hung up the phone.
What a fucking scam, and what's sad is some people actually fall for this and end up with nothing but a lighter wallet.
Now if you'll excuse me, a Nigerian prince is offering me $800 000 if I just give him my credit card number and lend him $20 000.
What a sucker this guy is...
UPDATE:
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Why I hate the Portly Piper.
Anyone living in this town knows exactly how fucking boring it is. The title for most exciting thing is an epic battle between the Wal-Mart and the Cineplex (If I'm wrong, please let me know...PLEASE).
It's pretty well known that if you want to something that's mildly entertaining (sorry Tim Horton's parking lot), that you have to go elsewhere to do it.
I guess if you're a "fun" or "interesting person", your weekends consist of heading to some club downtown and "partying like a rockstar" (or insert non-out of date popular dance/hip-hop song), or going the other way, east to slightly classier bars that have some type of dance floor to blow your entire paycheque on 4-5 overpriced alcoholic beverages.
I can't dance, I'm broke and my nicest outfit is a pair of ripped jeans (they didn't come that way either), and a hoodie with some team on it.
So yeah, that option doesn't apply to me.
My weekends usually consist of sitting in a friend's basement while we collectively vow to "do something". We usually end up doing just that, but "something" is almost always "watching TV" or "playing Madden".
It looks a lot like this:
If you live in this town, and aren't away for school, and these two situations aren't a regular occurrence to you I'll tell you what is. You're a regular at this place:
Ahh...the good old Portly right? Where you're guaranteed to see someone you know.
That's part of why I hate going to this place.
Don't get me wrong, I don't really hate anyone and it is really nice catching up with people you haven't seen since elementary school/high school/that old job.
But once you start going every week, the nostalgia wears off.
"I haven't seen you since (insert one of the options above here)" turns into "I haven't seen you since...last week."
I'm not an interesting person, I'm actually pretty boring so all I really have when I haven't seen someone in a while are stuff along the lines of "What have you been up to? What school are you at? What program are you taking?"
It's a great conversation the first time, but when I see the same person the very next week, I'm out of ammunition. I really have nothing to say to you.
"What have you been up to?" is answered with "The same thing I was doing last week when you asked me".
Another reason I hate the Portly, and really pubs/bars/clubs in general is how expensive alcohol is. I don't like spending money on a beer that I could have got 6 of with the same price at the LCBO.
Next reason also applies to all places that serve alcohol. Shitty bands. I've been to maybe two bars in my life that had a half decent band. I'd rather have the ability to hear my friends and have my friends hear me than your butchered version of "Mr. Jones".
My final reason is something that happens on at least one Saturday of every month.
The Ultimate Fighting Championship.
I actually like the UFC, it doesn't hold a candle to boxing in my mind, but it's still pretty entertaining.
What I DON'T like about the UFC are the douchebags.
These guys:
I would rather spend 70 bucks to order the PPV at home and watch it myself then watch it in a packed bar listening to assholes in Affliction tees screaming at every TV to "kill that nigger".
I've heard worse, trust me.
So the next time you see me there, I had no say in the matter, and I most definitely will not be there for a while after that.
It's pretty well known that if you want to something that's mildly entertaining (sorry Tim Horton's parking lot), that you have to go elsewhere to do it.
I guess if you're a "fun" or "interesting person", your weekends consist of heading to some club downtown and "partying like a rockstar" (or insert non-out of date popular dance/hip-hop song), or going the other way, east to slightly classier bars that have some type of dance floor to blow your entire paycheque on 4-5 overpriced alcoholic beverages.
I can't dance, I'm broke and my nicest outfit is a pair of ripped jeans (they didn't come that way either), and a hoodie with some team on it.
So yeah, that option doesn't apply to me.
My weekends usually consist of sitting in a friend's basement while we collectively vow to "do something". We usually end up doing just that, but "something" is almost always "watching TV" or "playing Madden".
It looks a lot like this:
If you live in this town, and aren't away for school, and these two situations aren't a regular occurrence to you I'll tell you what is. You're a regular at this place:
Ahh...the good old Portly right? Where you're guaranteed to see someone you know.
That's part of why I hate going to this place.
Don't get me wrong, I don't really hate anyone and it is really nice catching up with people you haven't seen since elementary school/high school/that old job.
But once you start going every week, the nostalgia wears off.
"I haven't seen you since (insert one of the options above here)" turns into "I haven't seen you since...last week."
I'm not an interesting person, I'm actually pretty boring so all I really have when I haven't seen someone in a while are stuff along the lines of "What have you been up to? What school are you at? What program are you taking?"
It's a great conversation the first time, but when I see the same person the very next week, I'm out of ammunition. I really have nothing to say to you.
"What have you been up to?" is answered with "The same thing I was doing last week when you asked me".
Another reason I hate the Portly, and really pubs/bars/clubs in general is how expensive alcohol is. I don't like spending money on a beer that I could have got 6 of with the same price at the LCBO.
Next reason also applies to all places that serve alcohol. Shitty bands. I've been to maybe two bars in my life that had a half decent band. I'd rather have the ability to hear my friends and have my friends hear me than your butchered version of "Mr. Jones".
My final reason is something that happens on at least one Saturday of every month.
The Ultimate Fighting Championship.
I actually like the UFC, it doesn't hold a candle to boxing in my mind, but it's still pretty entertaining.
What I DON'T like about the UFC are the douchebags.
These guys:
I would rather spend 70 bucks to order the PPV at home and watch it myself then watch it in a packed bar listening to assholes in Affliction tees screaming at every TV to "kill that nigger".
I've heard worse, trust me.
So the next time you see me there, I had no say in the matter, and I most definitely will not be there for a while after that.
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Sunday, May 30, 2010
NBA Playoffs - Finals Prediction
(1) Los Angeles vs. (4) Boston
Prediction: Boston in 6
Result: Lakers in 7
So I was wrong, but could not be happier. Fuck the Celtics.
Prediction: Boston in 6
Result: Lakers in 7
So I was wrong, but could not be happier. Fuck the Celtics.
Monday, May 24, 2010
NHL Playoffs - Stanley Cup Final Prediction
Ahh...finally I can enjoy the Stanley Cup playoffs.
Yes, the Philadelphia Flyers have finally killed that annoying bug that just wouldn't die that is the Montreal Canadiens.
I can finally go back to my regular dislike of all Philadelphia sports teams.
I say "dislike" because "hate" is a very strong word, that I have only reserved for the Montreal Canadiens and the Pittsburgh Steelers.
Anyways, the final best of 7 series for Lord Stanley's Mug is finally set.
Your 2010 matchup is between the Chicago Blackhawks and the Philadelphia Flyers.
Now you might think because I previously mentioned my dislike for all things sport from the City of Brotherly Love, that I'll be cheering for the Chicago Blackhawks, but that's not the case.
Because really, I'm not cheering for anyone. As I've mentioned before, my team didn't make it to the post-season.
Instead, I'll be cheering for players, and since the Flyers have these guys:
And the Blackhawks have these guys:
I don't really care who wins.
I just hope it's a good series with some good hockey, and it will be.
That being said, I'll still make a pick.
(2) Chicago vs. (7) Philadelphia
I'm really tempted to go with Philly here, since they're on some crazy run (see Eastern Conference Semi-Finals) but I can't pick against such a balanced and talented team like the Hawks. So...
Prediction: Chicago in 6.
Result: Chicago in 6.
I guess we'll see if Sidney Crosby really did bust that "curse" of touching the Prince of Wales trophy...
UPDATE: Nope.
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