It's pretty well known that if you want to something that's mildly entertaining (sorry Tim Horton's parking lot), that you have to go elsewhere to do it.
I guess if you're a "fun" or "interesting person", your weekends consist of heading to some club downtown and "partying like a rockstar" (or insert non-out of date popular dance/hip-hop song), or going the other way, east to slightly classier bars that have some type of dance floor to blow your entire paycheque on 4-5 overpriced alcoholic beverages.
I can't dance, I'm broke and my nicest outfit is a pair of ripped jeans (they didn't come that way either), and a hoodie with some team on it.
So yeah, that option doesn't apply to me.
My weekends usually consist of sitting in a friend's basement while we collectively vow to "do something". We usually end up doing just that, but "something" is almost always "watching TV" or "playing Madden".
It looks a lot like this:
If you live in this town, and aren't away for school, and these two situations aren't a regular occurrence to you I'll tell you what is. You're a regular at this place:
Ahh...the good old Portly right? Where you're guaranteed to see someone you know.
That's part of why I hate going to this place.
Don't get me wrong, I don't really hate anyone and it is really nice catching up with people you haven't seen since elementary school/high school/that old job.
But once you start going every week, the nostalgia wears off.
"I haven't seen you since (insert one of the options above here)" turns into "I haven't seen you since...last week."
I'm not an interesting person, I'm actually pretty boring so all I really have when I haven't seen someone in a while are stuff along the lines of "What have you been up to? What school are you at? What program are you taking?"
It's a great conversation the first time, but when I see the same person the very next week, I'm out of ammunition. I really have nothing to say to you.
"What have you been up to?" is answered with "The same thing I was doing last week when you asked me".
Another reason I hate the Portly, and really pubs/bars/clubs in general is how expensive alcohol is. I don't like spending money on a beer that I could have got 6 of with the same price at the LCBO.
Next reason also applies to all places that serve alcohol. Shitty bands. I've been to maybe two bars in my life that had a half decent band. I'd rather have the ability to hear my friends and have my friends hear me than your butchered version of "Mr. Jones".
My final reason is something that happens on at least one Saturday of every month.
The Ultimate Fighting Championship.
I actually like the UFC, it doesn't hold a candle to boxing in my mind, but it's still pretty entertaining.
What I DON'T like about the UFC are the douchebags.
These guys:
I would rather spend 70 bucks to order the PPV at home and watch it myself then watch it in a packed bar listening to assholes in Affliction tees screaming at every TV to "kill that nigger".
I've heard worse, trust me.
So the next time you see me there, I had no say in the matter, and I most definitely will not be there for a while after that.
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